Musical Play: “The Nutcracker”

Complete Script & Audio: $45 (other items also available)

(3 customer reviews)
What is this?An easy, flexible, 30-minute musical play for grades 2-6. Comes with the script, audio recording (with both a vocal and instrumental version of each song), and a teacher's guide. No music or drama experience needed!
Story & ContentFunny script ✓ Catchy tunes ✓ Flexible casting ✓ Dumb jokes
Putting lyrics to the music from the famous ballet, this show adds even more silliness to the already-nutty Nutcracker story. Learn more!
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    • - For this play, the sheet music is a Lead Sheet (includes melody and chord symbols, no notated accompaniment).

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Synopsis

Our version of the Nutcracker story uses the famous music from Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker Suite, complete with silly lyrics! The show works great both as a holiday play or just for fun.

Preview the script and songs!

Key Concepts

Important Note

All of the music in this show comes from the actual Nutcracker Suite by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky! (We can do that because he's dead.) We've picked the best songs, rearranged them in different styles, and added hilarious lyrics. Audiences will love the familiar tunes with their Bad Wolf spruce-up.

The Nutcracker can be a great complement to your curriculum resources in language arts, a twist on a beloved holiday tale, or a "just for fun" silly show that all ages will enjoy. And, like all of our plays, this show can be used to improve reading, vocabulary, reading comprehension, performance and music skills, class camaraderie and teamwork, and numerous social skills (read about it!) -- all while enabling students to be part of a truly fun and creative experience they will never forget!

Aligned with national standards! View the standards and vocabulary. 

Publication Info

Author: Lisa Adams and John Heath (Book and Lyrics), Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky (Composer), and Mike Fishell and Roy Fishell (Arrangements)

ISBN:
978-1-886588-70-7

© 2018
Bad Wolf Press, LLC

3 reviews for Musical Play: “The Nutcracker”

  1. LTD4Kids (verified owner)

    We presented "The Nutcracker" as part of a holiday show performed by children in the 3rd – 5th grade. At first the children found the musical a bit difficult to learn. They were slow on the lines and the songs, but as they got more into it, they began to have fun with the show. The audience made up mostly of parents and friends really enjoyed it and found it interesting and fun. As usual this Bad Wolf show delivered once again. The children had lots of fun working on it and also learned some background on the "Nutcracker" story that many adults are not even aware. Highly recommend.

  2. Cathy Foxhoven (verified owner)

    I'm not sure how it is going to play because we haven't started rehearsals yet, but in preparing I find it fun and creative. I love that the songs are directly from the Tchaikovsky music. I know the students are going to be excited by it.

  3. RJ (verified owner)

    I was excited to do a brand new play with my class, and it went very well. Although this one didn't have a lot of the curriculum connections that I appreciate, I was still able to address stylistic use of language, vocabulary development, and reading strategies. It was a fun play to do and my students appreciated the fact that it was strange! Our audience loved it because, as adults, they got the humor.

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The Show

We want you to know what you're getting, so the cast list and first third of the script are available here! Bad Wolf shows are written for flexibility and can be edited however you like to meet the needs of your actors, school, curriculum, parents, astrological chart, latest whim, etc. If you have questions about the portions of the script not shown, please contact us.

Casting

Flexible casting from 11-40 students. Use as many Toys, Mice, etc. in each scene as desired. One student can easily play several roles if needed, and individual roles can be doubled up (Marie, Drosselmeier, and Nutcracker/ Nephew are in several scenes and actors can easily be swapped out halfway through). Note that all roles can be played by any gender.

CHARACTERS:
Pyotr Tchaikovsky
Lev Ivanov
Marie
Fritz
Louise
Godfather Drosselmeier
Mouse King
Mouse Soldiers (2)
Nutcracker/Nephew
Clara
Toys (2)
Soldiers (2)
Dollies (4)
ETA Hoffmann
Alexandre Dumas
King
Queen
Lady Mouserings
Astrologer
Princess

and a CHORUS composed of all actors who are not playing roles on stage at the time.

Script

This is the first one-third of the script.

(CLASS enters and sings:)

Song 1

Listen to a sample!

Welcome to our Nutcracker; we all hope you like it
Welcome to our Nutcracker; having fun is our one goal.
We took the tale and shrunk it under half an hour
No way we overthunk it; that is not the way we roll!

There's not one arabesque in sight all night
We've got jokes and a song or eight, all great!

GROUP A: You're gonna wanna hear it all
GROUP B: You're gonna wanna cheer it all
GROUP A: You're gonna wanna use your flash
GROUP B: You're gonna wanna give us cash.
A: You're gonna wanna
B: Gonna wanna
A: Gonna wanna
B: Gonna wanna
ALL: Gonna wish that you were us today!

All set, so let's get cracking; time to tell our story
Watch close, there's nothing lacking; crazy plot but lots of fun!
Welcome to our Nutcracker; we all hope you like it
Welcome to our Nutcracker; hey, the Overture is done!

(TCHAIKOVSKY and IVANOV enter.)

TCHAIKOVSKY: That song sounded familiar.

IVANOV: It should, Tchaikovsky. You wrote it.

TCHAI: I WHAT? I don't think so. Those don't sound like lyrics I would write.

IVANOV: They're not. A modern composer wrote them using your music, the Miniature Overture from the Nutcracker Suite.

TCHAI: Can they do that?

IVANOV: Well, yes. Because you're dead.

TCHAI (looking disappointed): Oh, that again. It does get in the way of things. You're dead too, aren't you?

IVANOV: Oh certainly! It was way back in 1892 when I, Lev Ivanov, worked with you on the Nutcracker Ballet.

TCHAI: Oh, that's right! I wrote the music and you choreographed the dancing. Is the show we're about to see going to be a ballet?

IVANOV: I don't think so. There was a line in there about "no arabesques in sight, all night." I can't imagine why anyone wouldn't want arabesques in the thousands, but that's what the song said.

TCHAI: So this is probably something new-fangled?

IVANOV: I'm afraid so.

TCHAI: With the same really weird plot?

IVANOV: Almost certainly.

TCHAI (indicates audience): And so these people should just go with it if they feel like some things don't make a whole lot of sense?

IVANOV: Absolutely!

TCHAI: Well, it's only 30 minutes. How bad can it be?

IVANOV: Good point. Let's begin!

TCHAI: We start at the home of three children: Louise, Fritz, and Marie.

IVANOV: They are eagerly awaiting their Godfather Drosselmeier, who is a fantastic clock and toy maker...

(THEY exit. MARIE, FRITZ , and LOUISE enter. MARIE and FRITZ look eagerly out the window while LOUISE does something teenagerish.)

FRITZ: I see him! Godfather Drosselmeier! Right there!

MARIE: Where? (SHE pauses, then elbows him.) That's not Godfather! That's the old lady from down the street.

FRITZ: OOOH! THERE!

MARIE: Fritz! That's a DOG!

LOUISE (trying to appear mature): Will you kids stop fidgeting? He'll be here soon.

MARIE: Oh, don't try to be so grown-up, Louise!

FRITZ: Yeah! You want presents from Godfather as much as we do.

LOUISE (giggling): You're right! He makes the most wonderful clocks and toys.

FRITZ: I hope he won't ask us any of his weird questions, though.

LOUISE: He always does. But it's worth it!

ALL THREE (grabbing hands and skipping excitedly in a circle): Pre-sents! Pre-sents! Pre-sents!

(THEY sing:)

Song 2

Listen to a sample!

OH! YEAH!
We just can't wait we just can't wait
OH! YEAH!
We just can't wait we just can't wait
OH! YEAH!
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait
OH! YEAH!
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait!

Godfather comes once a year
He's rather strange but oh so dear
Drosselmeier's our favorite guy
He's kinda weird; we let it slide

Bring toys
Bring toys
Bring toys bring toys
Bring toys for all the girls and boys

OH! YEAH!
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait!
OH! YEAH!
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait
So excited so excited
Can't wait can't wait can't wait can't wait!

(DROSSELMEIER enters.)

DROSSELMEIER (to MARIE): What's the square root of 9145?

MARIE: Six and a half.

DROSSEL: Wrong! (to FRITZ) What's the secret ingredient in the sauerkraut served at Heinrich's Hofbrau?

FRITZ: Salamanders!

DROSSEL: Wrong! (to LOUISE) What did the philosopher of Bankaresh say to the lemon tree at midnight?

LOUISE: "I know you have friends. I know you tell lies. I know you serve your country."

DROSSEL (astonished): Why yes, that is right!

FRITZ: Do you have any toys for us?

MARIE: Or dolls?

LOUISE: Fritz! Marie! How rude! Godfather, I'm so sorry.

DROSSEL: They are children. Born rude! You were the same when you were their age.

LOUISE: Ouch. Sorry.

DROSSEL: Well my greedy little mites, here are the gifts I have brought. (HE pulls out a small clock for LOUISE, a toy soldier for

FRITZ, a doll for MARIE, and a Nutcracker.)

KIDS (hugging their gifts): Thank you!

DROSSEL (holds up toy Nutcracker): And THIS is a special gift for the whole family. Watch this! (HE pulls out a nut and puts it in the Nutcracker's mouth and cracks it. NOTE: A toy Nutcracker really doesn't crack nuts, so just pantomime it.)

(KIDS clap appreciatively)

LOUISE: A Nutcracker! How fun!

FRITZ: Yeah, but can it crack THIS?

(FRITZ jams his toy or some other small object in the Nutcracker's mouth, and the Nutcracker's jaw breaks. You might choose to play a loud noise at this moment or simply have the actors' reactions make it clear that the Nutcracker has been damaged.)

MARIE (very upset): Fritz, you BROKE it!

DROSSEL: Greedy AND thoughtless! (HE wraps a bandage/scarf around the Nutcracker and gives it to MARIE.) See if you can fix this. Now begone with you, mites. I'm going to visit with your parents.

LOUISE: Come to bed, Marie.

MARIE (cradling the Nutcracker): I'm going to stay up for a while and take care of him.

(ALL exit except MARIE. SHE yawns and falls asleep. CLARA, an old-fashioned china doll, and TOYS enter. THEY suddenly notice MARIE and stop short.)

CLARA: Yikes! I thought it was safe for us toys to come to life!

TOY #1: Why is Marie sleeping in the living room?

TOY #2: How terrifying! Stumbling on a human face when you're not expecting it!

CLARA: I know. They are SO creepy.

TOY #1: Glad she's asleep anyway. When they're awake they just STARE at you with those blank eyes.

TOY #2: It's the main reason I'm in therapy.

TOY #1: Is it?

MARIE (waking and sitting up, rubbing her eyes): Clara! Is that you? Genie? Bunny? [substitute names as needed.] You're alive!

TOY #2: No we're not.

MARIE: Yes you are! You're alive!

TOY #1 (waving fingers like a magician or hypnotist): You're just dreaming, Marie. Go back to sleep...

CLARA (to TOYS): Drop the act, guys. The jig's up.

(CLARA and TOYS sing; MARIE watches from the side.)

Song 3

Listen to a sample!

All your toys and dolls come alive
Every single night
While you're sleeping
Teasing and amusing
Joking and a-schmoozing
Taking time for musing on complexities of life.

All your toys and dolls come alive
Every single night
While you're sleeping
Playing and competing
Writing and spreadsheeting
We're free and blithe.

Why don't we try to earn our keep
When all the humans are asleep?
Why don't we help with all the chores
While Daddy drools and Mommy snores?
Do the laundry, do the dishes, trim the hedges, feed the fishes
Clean the oven, yes it's yucky
Good thing we are fit and plucky!

TOY #1:
Dust the blinds and scour the tub and take the fridge apart and scrub

TOY #2:
Find what rolled beneath the chair
(Our little hands can get in there)

CLARA:
And do repair the creaky stair right there

TOYS #1 and 2:
We just might do it all if you believed your kids when they say

CLARA, TOYS, and CHORUS:
All your toys and dolls come alive
Every single night
While you're sleeping
Teasing and amusing
Joking and a-schmoozing
Taking time for musing on complexities of life.

All your toys and dolls come alive
Every single night
While you're sleeping
Playing and competing
Writing and spreadsheeting
We're free and blithe.

(CLARA and TOYS exit. NUTCRACKER and SOLDIERS enter.)

(This concludes the first one-third of the script.)

The Songs

Click on any song to listen to a snippet. Click the cart icon to purchase any track for $1.

Standards

Common Core and Other National Standards

Language Arts

National Core Arts Standards

Vocabulary

Terms Related to Ballet

arabesqueoverturecomposerchoreograph
waltztaffetalibrettofootwork


General Vocabulary-Building

"overthunk"new-fangledsquare rootsauerkraut
philosophergodfatherhofbraujig (scheme)
miteschmoozemuse"spreadsheeting"
blithepluckyscournigh
stoopglowerstancelinger
zingerindubitablydimensionfeud
famishedconcedeconfectionmarzipan
rapturousdiabetesrage (v.)"a fright"
freelancerglitchprofoundthunderstruck
shuckbreakthroughfortecocktail weenies
adieu"en fuego" (spanish for "on fire")

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